This song was written by Bruce and I with in loving memory of my mother Regina C. Williams, who was tragically killed in a car accident on February 15th, 2007. This song reminds me of how beautiful she was, and that I have hope to see her again in heaven.
I pray that this song blessed you..
To hear my husband Bruce playing the bass “plug in earphones” (smile).
We all have to take the time to examine “Who’s First?” in our lives.
Key Points to Think About:
If our relationship with God is not first then everything else in our lives will be out of order
Our personal relationship with God will determine how successful our lives will be
Our personal relationship with God determine the strength of the foundation for other relationships
Deut. 6:3, Joshua 1:8, Matthew 7:24-29
Watch this Vlog as Rotoya goes a little further in the subject..
Bruce and I were married on Saturday, January 12th, 2013 at 3PM. Our wedding theme was “In His Time” (Ecclesiastes 3:11). God truly blessed us this day with love and support from our family and friends. These videos are a glimpse of our Wedding Day. I spend five months planning our wedding, and fell in love with the wedding planning process. My love has increased and now I offer wedding planning services “Simply Beautiful by RG.” We pray that you enjoy these videos. ~Rotoya~
This blog is dedicated to all the soon to be married and newlyweds!!
From Bruce’s Perspective:
When we were preparing to get married we heard a lot of horror stories about how the first year ofis difficult. These people who meant well (I think lol) were basing their forecast for us on their own experiences. I think because everyone has different strength’s, weaknesses and circumstances, its impossible to pinpoint what the first year of marriage will be like. I will say ours was awesome!! It wasn’t full of the disagreements and all the other negative stuff we heard about. While I can’t say what another couple’s will be, I do know it doesn’t HAVE to be terrible because ours wasn’t.
From Rotoya’s Perspective:
I have learned over the years that there is Power in what you say. Honestly, at first hearing from some, that the “First year of marriage would be rough, and that everything would be soooo different” actually put a little fear in my heart. I began to wonder and create different scenarios that could make our first year of marriage rough. But then we came together and decided, that would not be our story!!! Each time those words were spoken to us we would quietly say “that will not be our story.” And guess what?!? It wasn’t our story. We had a wonderful first year and we are believing God for many more. I will encourage all soon-to-be married, newlyweds, and marriage vets to begin to speak what you desire over your marriage. The bible says that “Life and death is in the power of the tongue!” (Proverbs 18:21) You can decide how you would like your marriage to be!! Believe me it works!!
So Don’t Believe or Receive the Lie….
We love you and are praying for you!
Bruce and Rotoya~
Be Quick to Forgive and Even Quicker to Forget
A few quick tips on handling conflict in marriage:
While we were writing our initial list of the “12 Things We Learned our First Year of Marriage” (check out that blog), Bruce interjected a key principle, “Be Quick to Forgive and Even Quicker to Forget.” With wide eyes, I yelled out “YES, That’s a GOOOOOD One!” Over the last year, Bruce and I rarely had any serious arguments. We actually on had about 3-4 that I can remember. In fact, I can’t really call them arguments, because they were more like “disagreements.” Some may say, well that’s because of this or that, but I know a reason why we had very limited disagreements. Before we married during our pre-marital counseling we decide how we would deal with conflict in our marriage.
Being the woman that I am, I decided to write this blog, because I found that I was often the one who would have to do the forgiving. Bruce laughs about this:) This was because my emotions would take over and I would get upset and sometimes wrongly misinterpret things communicated to me by my husband. We often found after we slowed down and talked about the subject at hand we could come to a better understanding of each other’s point of view.
But what do you do if you get hurt in a disagreement? How do you handle all of those feelings? Should you walk away?
I will share what we agreed to in pre-marital counseling and have been practicing ever since:
1. We have a “Bench” in our home. We were instructed by our counseling Pastors to buy a bench and place it in our first home. The bench is a “place of reconciliation”. Now this bench is to only be sat on when there is a conflict in our marriage. When Bruce or I get upset about something, we are to stop what we are doing and go to the bench. Once the other spouse sees their husband/or wife on the bench, they are to join them immediately. The spouse that went to the bench first then proceeds to explain to their spouse how they feel and then vice versa. The married couple is not to leave the bench until the issue is resolved. This may sound crazy, but it actually works!! What we found is that we both did not want to hurt each other. We also found that we were able to calmly express how we felt, and keep our ears open to hear our spouses feelings also. Finally, we found that our hearts were open to each other while on the bench because we both ultimately wanted to “reconcile.” Keep in mind, that the bench is to be small so that while you are sitting, you are close to one another:)
Okay so I hear you now, “What happens if you have a disagreement and your not home.” If we were not at home, and we had a disagreement. I would say “Bruce I am on the bench.” Immediately, he knew what that meant and we would take time to handle the issue at hand.
“Our Reconciliation Bench”
2. Once you discuss the issue, be sure to ask each other for forgiveness. For example, “If I hurt you the way I said that, please forgive me.” or “If I hurt you in anyway, please forgive me.” This will go along way in your marriage. I often say, forgive before you feel it. Even if you are still feeling upset, take the time to verbally forgive your spouse, the emotions will soon subside.
3. After you forgive, be quick to forget! Once you have forgiven your spouse commit in your heart that you will be like God and “Blot out the transgressions” of your spouse. Decide that you will not bring up past conflicts or hurts again. This will only bring forth negative results.
Few Quick Tips on Handling Conflict:
1. Never go to sleep angry (Ephesians 4:26)
2. Never walk out of the house on your spouse in the middle of a conflict, deal with it then get some fresh air, if needed:)
3. Be Slow to anger, quick to listen, slow to speak…(James 1:19)
Here a few scriptures on forgiveness:
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”
I pray this blog will help you as continue on your journey in marriage.
Be sure to share your thoughts on the blog. Also please share blog with others:)
What do you think about the “bench?”
With Love and Blessings,
Rotoya Goodwin~
Pastor Rotoya Goodwin taught this class to encourage and empower singles!!
Definition of Being Single- A Separate, Unique and Whole Individual
The goal of this course is to teach individuals how to develop and maintain a Godly single life. During the class students will learn the spiritual and natural freedoms of living single today. In addition, they will learn how to be content and enjoy singleness, while simultaneously developing into who God has designed them to be.
Textbook: Being Single and Satisfied (Tony Evans) & Keys for Living Single (Myles Munroe)
Please feel free to leave comments below:)
How to Grow Your Business
By: Rotoya Williams Goodwin,Owner of Pee Wee Piano School of the Arts
It’s hard to believe that I have been in business for 10 years now! Even though, it has been ten years I cannot help but to remember a few key principles that I practiced over the years. These principles have not only helped me to maintain a successful business but also aided in my business’ growth.
I started my business in the second semester of my freshman year at Howard University. My father gave me the suggestion to start a business providing piano lessons for children. In fact, he actually named my business Pee Wee Piano. After receiving the advice to begin the business and actually deciding to go ahead with it, I quickly realized that “I was on my own and without business knowledge”. Thankfully, I did not let my inexperience intimidate me. By God’s grace I started on a new journey that we call entrepreneurship.
Applying these principles has helped Pee Wee Piano to grow from solely providing piano lessons to becoming a school of the arts. We started with ZERO clientele and now have grown to maintain over 150 students in our school. Pee Wee Piano offers multiple programs including, Private Music Instruction for Piano, Drums, Guitar, and Voice. In addition, we provide an After School Program, and Summer Camp for students throughout Prince George’s County.
This blog is not a blueprint for business growth, but it is a resource of 5 principles I have learned and practiced over the years.
1.) Set realistic goals and make a plan to accomplish the goal: When starting a business you will have an initial vision for your company. Often times the vision can be so expansive, that it may be overwhelming to even begin to figure out how to achieve your dream. Instead of setting goals that you know are unrealistic and completely out of reach take time to set more realistic goals. It is recommended to set short term goals that will over time get you to your desired vision. I have found out that short-term goals are easier to accomplish and therefore, helped my business to grow. When you set a goal, make sure that you have a plan to accomplish the goal. Also don’t forget to set deadlines for yourself and stick to them!!! Goal-by-Goal you will get closer to your vision!!
2.) Building rapport, People buy from people they know, like and trust:
This is one of my number one business principles! If you can get a handle on this key, you will undoubtedly see growth in your business. As a new inexperienced business owner, I did not have much skill. Therefore, I relied heavily on my ability to build rapport with potential and current clients. Often times, my clients would verbally tell me they were enrolling in our programs because they “liked me.” There is so much power in building rapport with people and trust me, it goes a long way. Remember people will conduct business with people they know, like and trust.
Here are four simple ways to build rapport:
1. Be approachable. In person, carry yourself in such a way that is easy-going, friendly, and confident.
2. Ask good questions. People love to talk about themselves. Asking questions and paying attention to the answers helps you learn more about the other person and shows that you have a genuine interest in them. The key is in your follow-up. This is how they’ll know you are truly catching their details.
3. Stay upbeat. No one likes to be around a complaining, negative victim. It’s awfully difficult to connect and engage with people who are leaking poison. Be known for your positive attitude and willingness to help others (yes, even strangers). Remember, easy-going and approachable.
3. Use their name. In person, the sweetest sound to anyone is the sound of his or her own name. Take the time to remember your client’s names. It shows that you have taken the time out to learn about them. It also makes the client feel safe and gives the impression that you know them.
4. Understand that you can still have rapport with someone even though you disagree. If you don’t see eye-to-eye, you can be respectful and appreciate differing opinions. Communication and relationshipsare based on compromise.
3.) Consistency is Key: Very little in business works after doing it the first time. Being successful in business relies on being consistent. If you desire to grow your business you must be determined to “Keep at it!” Often times, people quit business because they do not see the desired results after one outburst of marketing, or even a few months of business. As a business owner, you must have a plan and stick to it. Be ready to repeat your plan again and again until you see results. You should plan to succeed, but do not fear failure. If you fail at something, or something doesn’t go as planned use that failure as an opportunity to readjust. There have been times when I had to readjust my business plans due to a few “bumps in the road”. Remember to be successful in business you must be determined to reach your goals! It will take consistency, tenacity, endurance, and a lot of patience.
4.) Include God In Your Business Plans: Now everyone may not agree with this one, but it is top on my list. I am confident, that my business’ success has resulted from my determination to include God in on my business endeavors. It is important to take your business goals to God in prayer and to speak words of faith concerning your business. For example, I have a goal to have 150 students in my summer program this year. Instead of just going ahead and exerting all of my natural efforts to get the students in the program, I present my enrollment desire to God in prayer first! After which, I move forward with my business efforts. Now I have God’s favor and anointing working with and for me. Let me stop for a moment and say that you do not want to try to go into business without God, especially not in these times. Remember, “With God all things are possible!” (Matthew 19:26) Before I make significant changes in my business in regards to services, location, etc. I seek God’s counsel.
5. Giving and Receiving: If you desire to grow your business, always make room in your budget for giving. The bible says, “Whatever you sow, you shall reap…if you sow sparingly, you shall reap sparingly.” (Galatians 6:7-9) Look for ways to give away your services to those that are in need and watch God bless you! At Pee Wee Piano, I offer a community discount to families that are not able to pay the normal tuition fee. In some instances, I will even offer scholarships for the entire year. It is so important to incorporate giving into your business. Any service that you give away with no cost is not a “waste”, but a “seed.” I have seen how these seeds grow over time and multiply.
Thank you for taking the time out to read this blog! I pray that your business will grow exponentially as you begin to put these principles into practice.
To find out more about my business, Pee Wee Piano go to www.peeweepiano.com.
With Love and Blessings,
Rotoya Goodwin
Pastor Rotoya Goodwin taught this class to encourage and empower singles!!
Definition of Being Single- A Separate, Unique and Whole Individual
The goal of this course is to teach individuals how to develop and maintain a Godly single life. During the class students will learn the spiritual and natural freedoms of living single today. In addition, they will learn how to be content and enjoy singleness, while simultaneously developing into who God has designed them to be.
This video is specifically designed for Singles. Join in on the “Living Single 101″ Class. As you watch the video we pray that you will learn: 1) How to Wait on the Lord 2) What you should do while you are single 3) How to fulfill your calling as a single, making God your focal point 4) How to deal with the pressure to get married
Feel free to leave your comments below..
Make time to spend with one another….
Three quick tips for spending quality moments with your spouse
Employer, Employee, Business Owner, Musician, Son, Brother, Minister, Friend, Collector of Fine Wool Suits, Writer, Martial Arts Instructor, Mentor, Cliff Jumper (but that was only once), Investor, 70’s aficionado, Jesus follower…I could name at least seven more but you would probably stop reading. Our lives are busy, full of things to do, people to see and places to go. But I have learned over the past year that spending quality time together with your spouse is extremely important. Oh yeah, I forgot a vitally important one HUSBAND (see what I mean).
I love my wife and though days are busy, I think about her all the time. Any good husband can relate. But let’s face it, we get no points unless she knows that. Not that marriage is some sort of sporting event, but every winning relationship is characterized and strengthened by spending quality time. So gentleman, (and ladies),
Here are three quick tips for spending quality moments with your spouse, even if your super busy and told yourself you don’t have enough time.
Time is something that you can never get back and learning to spend it with the one you love is essential to building a great relationship. So, go find your wife or husband and spend some time with them right now. I think I’ll do the same.
Oh yeah, throwing in a tune like this in the atmosphere never hurts either. Enjoy
What do you think is the biggest obstacle to spending time with the one you love?
Bruce
One of our Excursions, Rotoya initially had reservations about but in the end she enjoyed!
